Thursday, October 31, 2019

How to Be Me for Halloween

How to be Ericka for Halloween

What You Will Need:
  • A loose-fitting t-shirt; preferably one that features the Chicago Cubs, Marshall University, Teddy the Dog, or some travel destination.  If it's chilly, pair with a dark colored, Columbia fleece jacket.
  • Loose-fitting athletic pants, preferably either Adidas or Under Armour.  Yoga pants or leggings will not work.  If you are in a pinch, bootcut jeans will suffice as long as you wear them with a basic brown or black belt. 
  • A tube of Burt's Bees Beeswax Lip Balm (to be kept in your right pants' pocket.)
  • A Fit Bit Zip (to be kept in your left pants' pocket.)
  • A pair of running sneakers, preferably ASICS.
  • A can of Diet Dr. Pepper Cherry.
  • Either a crossbody purse or a student-style backpack with flags of foreign countries all over it.

How to Pull Off the Character:
  • Wear no makeup.  None.
  • Your hair can be dried and ironed straight.  For a more common look, should be allowed to dry naturally so that it has unruly, "beachy" waves.
  • Have a resting bitch face.
  • Wear minimal jewelry - a simple necklace, silver wedding band, maybe a simple bracelet on left wrist.  Earrings should be simple studs.
  • Speak with a deep voice.
  • Laugh in a free-flowing, hearty manner.
  • Possess knowledge of random 80s trivia - especially of pop culture, music, and movies of the 80s.  Knowledge of "one hit wonders" and Bon Jovi discography are a must.
  • Know very little current popular culture - especially TV shows, music, celebrity gossip, and most things on Instagram.
  • Have little dark bruises on your upper forearms (evidence of the dry needling sessions you've recently had to treat your tennis elbow).
  • If at a party or some other gathering with a lot of people, hang out along the perimeter of the gathering so that you can observe people and their interactions.  
  • Once you are in a smaller group, quick whit is essential!
  • Be VERY expressive with your facial expressions - this is something you are known for!
  • Decline straws.
  • Don't allow foods on your plate to touch one another.
  • Love, love, love the color purple.

Phrases/Vocabulary the Character is Known For:
  • "Y'all"
  • "Let me think about it."
  • "Gotcha."
  • "I'd love to travel there."
  • "Well, shit fire..."
  • "It poured the rain."
  • "Really? Really?"
  • "You're killin' me, Smalls..."


Have a very Happy Halloween!

Photo Credit: Matheus Bertelli from Pexels



Inspired by Steph and Allison

3 comments:

  1. Ha ha thanks for the instructions but I think I'll stick to being me tonight. (Probably curled up on the sofa watching catch up TV)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Love this!

    Shit fire. LOLOL

    Resting bitch face forever.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is so fun. My husband was complaining about a habit of mine the other day, so this made me think he'd be able to (too easily) compose a list like this about me lol.

    And I know nothing about current pop culture.

    ReplyDelete

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