Humpday Confessions (Vol. 12) - In My House

I confess...  In my house, we have an unknown and unseen culprit named Not-Me (like the character in The Family Circus comics) who is responsible for the mysterious disappearances of food, cutlery, dishtowels, and other household items.  Seriously, last month a restaurant sized box of aluminum foil, like the kind you would get at SAM's or COSTCO, went MIA.  When the question was asked, "Who took the large roll of aluminum foil?" both dependents of the house responded by saying, "Not me."

A year ago, five out of eight tablespoons disappeared, and I mean VANISHED without a trace, over spring break while I was in WV visiting my folks.

I replaced the nice, deep tablespoons that went missing with cheap, shallow spoons that the dependents in my house hate and I mean hate.  4 for 88¢ at Walmart.  The lesson to be learned here is this - take care of the nice silverware, otherwise you get the cheap stuff.

One of the dependents complained just the other day about the shallow spoons and asked when I was going to buy nicer spoons.  My response - "When you move out."

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I confess...  The washer in my house is only empty approximately 50% of time. Occupants of my house have been know to forget their items in the washer so long that the clothes start to get funky.  Then they have to rewash them and the vicious cycle may or may not continue depending on if someone else needs the washer after them. 

The dryer, on the other hand, is only empty 10% of time by my estimation. Some occupants seem to think that the dryer is an appropriate storage solution in lieu of taking their clothes to their  respective bedrooms and storing them in their chests or closets.

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I confess...  It is not uncommon to open up the pantry to find an empty box of something - a box of cereal with no cereal or an empty box of Pop Tarts.  Same thing goes for milk in the refrigerator.  The dependents in my house...  (Shake my head)

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I confess...  Many a science experiment has been cultivated in my fridge.  If you doubt me, check out this post from back in February in which I chronicled my experience in cleaning out the refrigerator.

My husband is the cook of the house and he has a bad habit of cooking WAY TOO MUCH, which yields a lot of leftovers.  Apparently I'm the only one in the house who is not a leftover snob and I'll eat some of the leftovers for lunch the next day.  But, I confess, there's only so much of a specific leftover that one person can endure and often these leftovers are sent down the disposal.

Not only am I the only one who eats leftovers, but I'm the only one who throws old leftovers out.  If I didn't do a refrigerator purge every once in a while, our fridge alone could be featured on one of those hoarding shows.

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I confess...  My husband and I are both guilty of hiding goodies and specific key ingredients required for upcoming meals so that they are not gobbled up overnight by one of the dependents or the ever-elusive Not-Me.

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Bottles of juice don't stand a chance of lasting more than 12 hours after being bought because the dependents in the house do not know the meaning of or practice moderation.  I confess...  The adult solution to this problem is that we rarely buy juice.

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I confess...  Every time I've worked on this post, I've found myself singing parts of the song, "In My House" by the Mary Jane Girls.  Yep, it's an obscure 80s song that is totally dating me.

Do you remember this song or the Mary Jane Girl's?  Are you guilty of any of my "In My House" confessions, too?  

As always, thanks for stopping by! 

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